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Megadoomer (Transcript)

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Megadoomer

The Massive and the Irken Armada hovers above the mechanical Storage Planet. Inside a long tube-like structure inside the planet lined with many individual storage compartments, the Tallest stand on a hover platform that lifts them upwards. Purple glances over at Red. The hover platform stops at a compartment. A beam shoots from the hover platform into a hole on the compartment covering, turning it see-through and revealing the Megadoomer Combat Stealth Mech inside.

Red: The Megadoomer Combat Stealth Mech! points at the machine impressively.

Purple: I don't like it!

Red: We didn't build it so you could "like" it. This one's going to planet Meekrob to help Invader Tenn conquer it!

Purple: Well, I should like it.

The platform begins to rise again. Cut to another compartment which becomes see-through revealing defective SIRs babbling un-understandable gibberish. One pops up strapped with dynamite and another tackles that one. Another pops up flaming and two more pop up wrestling. A whole ball of SIRs rolls by and then one SIR chases another with a buzz saw extending from his head. One swings an axe around while another fires a missile. Another hangs from a wire on the ceiling and yet another has its weaponry extend and detract from its head.

Purple: Malfunctioning SIR units! Hey! These things are dangerous! Anyone using these could really get hurt! Send them to Zim.

Red gasps.

Red: But they'll destroy him!

Red and Purple burst into laughter.

Purple: Uh, let's go eat food!

The platform rises. Cut to the Conveyor Belt Planet. Hundreds of packages move along the conveyor belts that encircle the planet. A slave Screw Head stands on a hover disk next to a conveyor belt pressing buttons on a remote. An Irken Guard stands in the distance. Another Screw Head lifts a package off of the conveyor belt and falls off of his hover disk due to its weight. Smikka Smikka Smoodoo presses some buttons on his remote. Two towering packages, one containing the SIRs and the other containing the Megadoomer, move along the conveyor belt and stop in front of him. Smikka stares at them. The SIR package has a computerized address that says 'To Zim: Earth' and the other says 'To Invader Tenn: Meekrob.' The Screw Head who fell off of his hover disk falls by in the background. Smikka watches as he falls by.

Smikka Smikka Smoodoo: Irken monsters... conquer my people! Take our planet... force us to ship packages! Can I call myself a man if I am a slave to the Irken machine? Our futures... crushed like so many little loving packing peanuts! No... NO, I say! I must rebel! I will... I WILL... switch the addresses on these two boxes!

Smikka presses some buttons on his remote and the two addresses switch.

Smikka Smikka Smoodoo: Let the revolution beg-

The Irken Guard shocks Smikka with his tasor staff and Smikka screams, then falls down smoking. Smikka groans. Cut to Earth. Zim (in disguise) walks down the sidewalk next to Spuddy.

Zim: And then, then Dib says "Raarr!" in front of the whole CLASS! Filthy slug! Ms. Bitters called on me! Understand? Filthy, squirmy Dib! SQUIRMY!

Spuddy's eyes jiggle.

Spuddy: What are you talking about!?! Who are you!?!

Zim: I can't believe the things that hhhhuman has done to me! Me! And...

Zim swings his fists around, grunting.

Zim: Dib!

Zim grunts some more, swinging his fists.

Spuddy: Why are you following me!?! I don't even go to your skool!

Zim: And the...

Zim growls.

Zim: Oh, he makes me so MAD! The horrible puny-brained meat child, with his little glasses and his...

They get to Spuddy's house and Spuddy runs up the walkway to his front door and opens it. Zim grunts.

Zim: HEAD!

Spuddy shuts the door and Zim begins to walk up the walkway.

Zim: My name is Dib with my pointy hair! Pointy haair!

Zim turns around and walks away.

Zim: I eat food and have stuff!

Zim waves his arms around. Spuddy watches from the window, traumatized. Cut to Zim's house. Zim walks up the walk way and opens the door.

Zim: Oh he will pay, how he will paaayy!

Zim enters and shuts the door behind him. The Megadoomer package crashes in his front yard.

Zim: Wooow!

Cut to the Irken Armada. It hovers over the planet Invader Stink was sent to conquer. The control panel of the Massive beeps. The main view screen transmits Zim inside his lab (now out of disguise).

Zim: Oh thank you you've done the right thing my Tallest and you won't be forgotten when I rule the Universe thanks to this amazing battle mech BYE!

The transmission goes into static. The control panel beeps again.

Irken Comm. Officer: Incoming transmission!!! From planet Meekrob.

The view screen cuts to Invader Tenn.

Invader Tenn: It's horrible! They're everywhere!

Tenn screams. The transmission shows the SIRs all over the place, babbling like crazy. One SIR uses the buzz saw coming out of its head to saw open the head of a SIR who has a cake with a stick of dynamite in it. Another SIR's head spins while another SIR peaks out from behind some rocks. Another SIR has its weaponry extended from its head and it firing it while another SIR holds its hand up and clamps at the air. One SIR hangs on a wire while another SIR fires a laser cannon. Cut to Zim's house. A sea of packing peanuts floods the house with the Megadoomer standing in the middle of the living room, the box it came in split in two behind it. GIR (in dog suit) makes happy noises and swims in the packing peanuts. GIR swims by Zim and Zim lifts him up by his ear.

Zim: The Megadoomer, GIR! The most powerful stealth robot in the Irken Military.

Zim drops GIR. GIR walks over towards the Megadoomer.

Zim: Engineered by conquered Vort scientists actually. They're filthy.

GIR gasps and then hugs the robot's leg.

GIR: It's got chicken legs!

Zim: Yes... Chicken legs. It also possesses a new generation destortion cloaking system. You know what that means?

GIR: Ooooooooh!

GIR wigs out and spazzes midair, screaming.

Zim: That means it turns invisible!

GIR: I had no idea!

Zim hops onto GIR's head. GIR's thruster feet activate and GIR lifts Zim up to the top of the Megadoomer.

Zim: It's a bit much but I will use this to annihilate the Dib!

Zim hops off GIR into the open cockpit. GIR hovers in place.

Zim: I can't wait!

GIR: I'm floatin'.

Zim presses some buttons, but nothing happens.

Zim: Hey! Huh? Whatsa matter with this thing?

GIR opens the battery shaft.

GIR: Awww...

GIR pulls out a long tube. Zim stands on the Megadoomer.

Zim: No batteries!?! Have to improvise!

GIR plugs a massive plug device into a socket in the house. The plug is connected to the Megadoomer by a long cord. Zim goes back into the cockpit and closes it behind him. He presses a button.

Computer: Cloaking device activated!

The Megadoomer turns invisible, but the cord and Zim can still be seen.

GIR: I can still see you!

Zim presses a button and the stealth mode deactivates. Zim pops out of the hatch.

Zim: Silence! My victory... begins... NOW!!!

Zim laughs evilly. He takes a deep breath and laughs some more. Then his laugh turns into a half-hearted chuckle. Cut to the outside of Zim's house. The Megadoomer plows through the wall . Zim pilots the Megadoomer sloppily, crushing a lawn gnome and crashing into the walks of the houses to the sides. Zim laughs evilly. He presses a button and the cloaking device activates. GIR pulls the power cord out of the house.

Zim: Careful with that power cord! Now I know you can't see me GIR because the cloaking device is on! Just follow the sound of the stomping!

The invisible foot of the Megadoomer crushes a fire hydrant, causing water to spew upward. As Zim walks down the street, a lamp post gets crushed.

Zim: The Dib pig won't see this one coming!

Zim starts laughing evilly, chokes, and laughs some more. Two neighbors stick their heads out of a window with their mouths agape at the sight of Zim in his invisible death machine. Another neighbor, Jay Bondy, looks up and Zim as he is entering his house. He trips and falls inside. A child takes a grocery bag from the Carol Milican and the groceries fall out of the button. Aimy, who is sitting at her computer in her room, hears the stomping and goes to her window and sees Zim in the invisible Megadoomer walk by. GIR follows behind the Megadoomer.

Zim: Look at their scared faces! They hear the terror but they see nothing! Fools!

The power cord runs out and the plug gets yanked out of the wall and flies into the street.

Computer: Powering down!

The Megadoomer stops and becomes visible. Zim pushes the levers but nothing happens.

Zim: GIR! What happened?

GIR: The plug thing! It's not plugged!

Zim: Another outlet! Quickly!

GIR runs to the plug, screaming. He giggles as he picks up the massive plug and carries it to the front lawn of a house right next to the MegaDoomer. There is a glowing pig lawn ornament. GIR kicks the pig away and puts the plug in the outlet the pig was plugged into. The Megadoomer becomes invisible again.

GIR: Gobble gobble gobble gobble gobble.

Zim clears his throat.

Zim: Onward to vengeance!

Zim stomps foreword and GIR follows. A police car being driven by the Lobotomy Cop drives down a street, sirens blaring, and he sees Zim burst through a tree and walk into the street. The Lobotomy Cop pulls out a weapon and pops out of the window, firing at Zim. The blasts hit the invisible Megadoomer and the cop tosses the weapon then hits the breaks. He crawls into the back seat just when the invisible foot of the Megadoomer crushes the front half of the car, stopping the siren. GIR, who is sitting on the power cord as it is dragged by the car, smiles at the cop.

GIR: Nyaaa!

Zim smirks to himself and continues walking. The cord runs out and the plug comes undone again. The force of the plug popping out throws GIR off of the cord and he smack onto the windshield of the Megadoomer. The MegaDoomer becomes visible.

Zim: GIR! Outlet! Before we're noticed!

GIR gets up and hops off the back of the Megadoomer, sliding down the cord.

GIR: Wooo hoo!

Cut to the Old Folks Home. GIR casts a shadow over it as he runs by. Some old people watch a Sci-Fi show with a Cyborg.

Cyborg: What I'm trying to say SIR... is that he was like no man I've ever SEEN!

GIR bursts through the window with the plug, yelling. GIR yanks out the TV plug and sticks the MegaDoomer plug in. GIR hops on top of the plug and break dances, while making victory noises.

Old man: What he say?

Cut to the street. A woman driving down the street stops at a red light. She smiles and stares, oblivious Zim Zim in the invisible Megadoomer yelling at her.

Zim: Hey! Get out of the way! Hey! Hey! Hey! Move it! Hey! Hey! You invoke my wrath!?!

The light turns green and she drives away.

Zim: Vengeance for Zim!

Cut to a sandbox where Chuck and Buck play with toy robots. A flashlight it positioned in the middle of the sandbox to give it spooky lighting.

Chuck: My robot hits yours with swarmers!

Chuck presses a button on the robot and two plastic missiles shoot out.

Buck: I counter with the wave pulse!

Lights on Buck's robot toy flashes. Chuck's eye twitches.

Chuck: I'm not playing with you anymore!

The sound of stomping is heard. The Megadoomer suddenly becomes visible, stepping on some metal bars nearby Chuck and Buck.

Zim: More power! Give me more power!

A flash of light occurs in the distance and the Megadoomer becomes invisible again. Chuck and Buck watch as the invisible Megadoomer walks away. GIR pops up and eats Chuck and Buck's toy robots, then giggles insanely and runs away. Zim plows through some trees and through some power cables. Cut to Dib's bathroom. Dib sets a cup onto the sink. He spits water into the sink and then wipes his mouth with his arm. The ground shakes and the toilet water ripples. Dib looks at the toilet. It happens again and Dib looks worried. It happens once last time.

Zim: Prepare yourself for the end, Dib!

Dib looks out the window. He runs out the front door. Zim is there in the invisible Megadoomer, tree branches sticking to it. GIR stands at its feet.

Zim: I've put up with you long enough, Dib! Now, fight an enemy you cannot see!

Dib: You're right there!

Zim: What?

Zim scoots over. Dib points at him.

Dib: There! Your mighty Irken cloaking device cloaks the robot but not you!

Zim: Lies! Now, behold the doom cannon!

Zim presses a button. The sound of the doom cannon moving into place is heard.

Dib: I can't. It's invisible!

GIR walks around behind Dib.

Zim: But you can see me?

Dib: That's what I said.

Zim: Oh that's stupid!

Dib: Really stupid!

Zim: You dare agree with me!?! Prepare to meet your horrible doom!

Zim presses a button over and over again at great speeds. Electricity surges through the Megadoomer.

Computer: WARNING! POWER DRAW CRITICAL!

All the lights in the city go out. The Megadoomer becomes visible.

GIR: Chicken!

GIR laughs.

GIR: I'm gonna eat you!

Dib: Wow!

Dib pulls out a camera (with the lens caps on) and starts taking pictures.

Zim: Power emergency! GIR! Power emergency!

Zim presses buttons in the Megadoomer but nothing happens.

Dib: Crop Circles magazine's gonna put me on the front cover! Somebody, take one with me standing next to it!

Dib looks around. He places the camera in GIR's hands. Dib runs over to the Megadoomer and starts posing. GIR takes pictures. Zim pounds his head against the Megadoomer control panel. Dib takes a vampirish looking pose.

GIR: Awwoh, you look so cute!

Zim: No, GIR! No! Security...

Zim yanks on his antennae.

Zim: ....compromiiise! Must.. self.. destruct!

Zim presses the self-destruct button. Zim is ejected from the back. He gets up and walks away.

Computer: 5... 4... 3... 2...

Dib ducts down.

Computer: 1...

Dib quickly lifts up to snatch his camera from GIR, then ducks back down. The Megadoomer explodes. The force sends GIR flying. Dib squeezes his eyes shut. Zim grabs the camera, and Dib opens his eyes again and looks up.

Zim: Victory!

Flaming debris from the MegaDoomer flies by in the background.

Dib: What do you mean 'victory'!?! Your robot exploded and you didn't destroy me!

Zim: It was a trick, yes! Eh, my real plan was to... steal this camera from you! So that you couldn't show these pictures, hah!

Dib tackles Zim. They wrestle over the camera as action music plays.

Dib: Give it back! Come on!

Zim tosses the camera from one hand to the other.

Zim: Nope, nope, uh uh, no way, uh uh!

Dib grabs the camera.

Dib: Victory for Earth!

Zim: You had the lens cap on.

Dib: I did not, I-

Dib looks at the camera and sees that it is true, then he screams. Zim runs away.

Zim: Victory! Victory for Zim!

A huge piece of debris falls on Zim. A large bird snatches Dib's camera and flies away, screeching.

Dib: Well, I liked that camera but I guess this is a victory for me... Yeah... or something... I'm going back to bed...

Zim (off screen): I am Zim!

Dib walks inside and shuts the door behind him. GIR is stuck to the door, his dog disguise torn up. He slides down the door. Cut to the Massive, still hovering above the planet Invader Stink was sent to conquer.

Irken Comm. Officer: Automatic signal!!! From the Megadoomer, Sir... It self destructed.

Purple: With Zim in it?

Red: Probably not. Probably not!

Red holds up a small frosted creature and squeezes it, making it squeak. The transmission screen cuts to Invader Tenn on planet Meekrob. The defective SIRs can be seen in the background. Tenn screams.

Invader Tenn: They've eaten everything!

A SIR pops his head into view.

Invader Tenn: We're all doomed!

Tenn yells in slow motion as a SIR runs by, on fire.

Invader Tenn: Dooomed!

A missile flies by and blows up the transmission screen she is using to contact the Tallest with. Tenn lifts her head up, covered in soot, as a SIR runs by. Lasers fire. Another SIR drops from the sky in the background, exploding when it hits the ground. The Almighty Tallest stare as the transmission is cut off, Red with frosting on his face, Purple holding one of the frosted creatures. Some kind of groan is heard.

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